I'm heading back to Michigan this weekend for a bridal shower. Elle and I have dinner plans tomorrow night with a good friend, Saturday I'll get to catch up with my college girlfriends and celebrate the upcoming marriage of my friend Megan. Elle will get to see her grandparents, her Auntie Christina and her cousin Aydan and possibly other family and friends. You never know who else I will see while I'm home.
But, the truth is, as much as I love seeing my friends and family, I hate going home now. Because, this weekend, I want nothing more then to walk through the doors of my parents house, plop my stuff down anywhere, give my Mom a big hug, my Dad his usual quick-yet loving hug, grab a glass of wine, put my feet up on the couch and shoot the shit with my parents. My parents. The most laid back, loving, fun, supportive, non-judgemental, always up for anything kind of people-I can say what I want and be myself, be a kid again, be my Mom and Dad's daughter....
Although I'm thankful I spent a lot of time with them, it's not enough. I of course wish I would have spent so much more.....I know I can never take back the past but I feel guilty. I want to redo it all....hug them more, tell them I love them more, well I know I couldn't have called anymore as I did that, but just have spent more time........time is all we have and that is why I do spend a lot of my time with friends and family-always have but I do it as much as possible now. I live for visitors and thankfully, we get a lot of them and I now cherish time even more with my family and my wonderful friends. They're all I have left.
I can't wait to see everyone over Mother's Day weekend for Elle's baptism. But I again will be wishing my parents were there.......but I am thankful for the strong family we have become.
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