Thursday, May 1, 2008

Will this ever get easier?

I attended a networking event tonight through work and the industry. The event was held at someone's house. Her house was beautiful and we had a wonderful catered Mexican dinner, margaritas and conversation with women in the Consumer Products Industry. I have to admit, it was hard, yet enjoyable at the same time.


I was suppose to attend a Network of executive women event the week you passed away, so when someone asked if I attended, I didn't know how to respond. I said there was a tragedy in the family so I was unable to attend. Then came more questions. Is everything okay? So I started asking myself, how far do I go? No one can handle the truth? This is so sad, I may start crying as I explain? So I said, there was a homicide and I lost my parents........




As I sit here, I ponder about the future and what it will bring. These career minded women I just spent 4 hours with were inspiring. Some were Mothers, single mothers, divorced, married with children, single, lived all over the country, executives, but they all were good-fun-kind-hearted people.




But did any of them lose both of their parents in the way that I did? Am I alone? Maybe not...




So, I guess I ask, will this ever get easier Mom and Dad? The both of you generally came up within 10 minutes of any new conversation. Even if it was just, "I am from Michigan and yes, both mine and my husbands parents live there". I am constantly reminded of how incredibly important you were to my life. I was in conversations tonight about where their children were going to school, or where in Hyde Park did their daughter buy a condo. I instantly pictured Dad at Boomers beaming with pride as he talked about our new house, job or new location or bragging about his grandson, Aydan.


Even if this does get easier, right now I am sorry to admit, I do not see that light at the end of the tunnel. I see me missing and thinking of you in every conversation, business setting, and event. Hopefully one day I will learn, how you still mention your wonderful parents and talk about where you are from, without discussing how they left.


Thank you for your continued guidance.








1 comment:

suemcj said...

melissa and christina, I loved your mother and father like they were my family, I have not been the same since this happened, I was in florida when we found out and I was crushed ,Pat ( pat in the hat ) as the kids called her was the most wonderful person that i have ever met, what saddens me is the when we moved I didn't keep in contact like I should have, I was too busy working and taking care of the kids, I loved them so much....the last time i saw them was a christmas party this last december, your dad called to ask if we (kevin and I ) were going, things were great we hugged and planned to meet together like old times...i think about them every day and cant come to terms with my anger that I lost 2 wonderful people in my life..i cant imagine what you and christina are going thru.if you ever need anything please let me know--your parents were so proud of you..we miss patandjerome..we loved them.........
sue, kevin,adrianne,adam and alex--email me suemcju@yahoo.com