So the kickoff gathering for my "Mom's club" began tonight and I have to say, it was a success. However it went off the exact opposite as I had thought it would. I often forget we are now Mommies and we cannot always plan our evenings out. It's really up to the little ones. They ultimately set the pace for the event.
I had little "ladybug" cookies set out (in honor of our group name), lemonade for the Mom's that had to drive, Red and White vino for those walking from across the street, and snacks for people to munch on. I pictured the first 30 minutes with us girls and babies in tow eating and drinking and introducing the girls that did not know each other. I either knew everyone through work, a business association, or neighbors... so I wanted to make sure those that didn't know each other at least had a formal introduction. I planned for the second part of the hour moving from the kitchen to the the "parlor room" sitting with our kids (in the chairs I had placed so perfectly in a circle so we could all see each other when talking), going around talking about various topics and then eventually I'd grab a book from Elle's bookcase and someone would volunteer to read...... So I'm guessing you can already picture what happened.
None of the above happened. Duh, we have babies!
The first Mom arrived and her little guy had to eat, he's 7 months old and on solids. It was so cute to watch this cutie suck down with a smiling face, a full jar of sweet potatoes. That was followed by another Mommy mixing her formula for her little one month year old that was ready to eat. And, neither of them were in my kitchen or parlor room, they were in the living room which I hadn't really set up and made very "baby friendly". But, like Mom's do, they plopped their stuff down and made it work. (but, they're not sitting in my strategically placed chairs! Hey there's cheese and crackers in the kitchen! C'mon Strawberries and dip anyone?!)
Next Mommy arrives, without kiddies in tow. She has two beautiful girls at home but Mommy needed a break and a glass of wine. Last Mommy arrives (which by the way, looks fabulous) with her 6 1/2 month year old, Elle knows this little guy quite well as she spent 3 weeks with him once I went back to work and before Ted's Mom came down. He has grown so much. She could only stay for about an hour as his bedtime is close to 7:30pm. (yes, we asked how she did this. we took notes)
It was amazing to me stepping back and seeing us all as "working Mothers", all trying to do the best we can for our babies, and to hear through different conversations, as we tried to scarf down a little taste of Ted's homemade guacamole in between feeding or tending to our little ones, what works best for us. Whether it's putting your bottles in the dishwasher (controversial topic #1), solids/formula/breastmilk..how much, too much, not enough and sleep--what time? too early? too late?--we are all doing the best we can. I loved surrounding myself with these women. I admire them all for different reasons. I am confident we can learn from each other. Yeah, we may all do things differently and have slightly different beliefs, but what I am learning pretty early on, that there is no "perfect way" to care for your baby or to raise a child. You have to trust your Motherly instinct but nothing beats sitting in a room filled with Mothers and picking their brain and getting advice on your particular challenges. Almost always, someone has went through the same thing and can give you their perspective.
I don't have my Mom here on earth any longer. She continues to guide me I'm sure of and has instilled so many things within me that allow me to carry on her spirit and way of living, but to not have that person to call 24-7 is hard. Knowing I will have a support group such as this is comforting. I hope each and every one of us learned something new today. But at the very least, I hope they know none of us are alone and we're always here to help!
Much love,
Ladybug Mommy
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