Labor day weekend

An emotional yet inspiring weekend in Atlanta as I got to visit with my good friend who recently was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer. I couldn't wait to give her a hug...I knew the right words wouldn't be said and nothing we could do would take this away but I know in my heart she felt loved and it hopefully reconfirmed that we are here for her....we are a drive, flight, phone call away....we are her biggest cheerleaders. Praying for her to keep up with the positivity. I'm so proud of her and pray Mom and Dad can watch over her too.

I came home from Atlanta feeling thankful for my good health. While I have stress and issues, my family is healthy......but it's amazing how quickly life comes back rolling in and you get back into routine, back to getting upset, and stuff just starts popping up that frusturates you. We have a lot of house things to take care of....a broken pipe in the basement, a dead tree thats massive and over 130 years old and tons of yard work and several other projects in and outside the house that we just have not had the time for this Summer.  All of this yet I'm worried and thinking about the lake. We are getting up to Harrison this weekend....so much to do, we are going to put it up on the market.  I'm devastated but we cannot manage two homes from this distance.....who were we kidding?? I feel another piece of my parents and childhood will be gone but I know in my heart it's the right thing to do but its not easy and its painful. Maybe it won't sell for a few years....maybe there will be more time to have the kids play up there so they'll remember the house.  We'll always take them to Harrison even if it means renting a place one day but it bothers me that I won't have that home base anymore that was my parents. Though they are gone, I can still say "my parents place"....and it feels good.....but they'd be so sad about the fighting and how little we can get up there with the distance....I know they would want us to make the best decision for the entire family.

Labor day is approaching and I would give any thing to be heading up with there with the kids and
to hang with mom and dad for the weekend....Everything is so different now.  There won't be a big family weekend....we'll see Ted's parents, will pop up to the lake to work our butts off while trying to 
chase a one year old and we may see Ted's brother and meet their little one if they have the baby over the weekend. I miss having my own family Unit and all i want is for my parents to take care of me. 
Just for the weekend. I know I'm an adult.....but I feel so alone at times and I hate it. The anger is still here...it all goes back to the void and I just want my parents back. 

I'm upset but I know Ted and I will get everything done (somehow)..and...even if we have to spend quite a bit of money, we'll eventually get everything at our own home too.  It will all work out but I'm stressed, ted's mom can't lift yet from her eye surgery so she can't watch our sweet boy. I was excited just Ted and I were going to the lake.....we could get stuff done.....and really do some much needed thinking........but you can't beat the coolest dude on the planet tagging along to the place where he was named from.....and he'll have to somehow help me go through pictures and some of the important things we need to start deciding who wants what. Something I never did at their home in Allen Park.....I couldn't do it and I'm not sure you can ever prepare yourself for going through your parents home or lake home.....such a painful thing. Letting go is so hard.