tragedy.

Man it is so hard to watch this coverage on the Colorado shootings. While there were so many details to our family tragedy I opted to not know, I find myself wanting to know the details in this public case....like my brother, this young man had access online to so many things that made it possible for him to do the unthinkable. It sure is terrible it is that simple to collect guns, bullets and all of the supplies over a 6 month period and cause no warning signs to anyone. I feel for all of the people who have died and to the family members left behind in such a tragic event...

I swear, ever since Mom and Dad have passed....I now see tragedy in the World, in people I know.....I hear terrible stories every month...a suicide, cancer, illnesses, car accidents....surely this was happening four ago but not to people I knew. It's happening all around me now.

Hearing people who survived the Colorado tragedy feel so blessed to be alive and are hugging their children a little tighter these past few days. I wish that stuck with me. I should feel lucky to be alive each and every day. My parents would give anything to be here. And I could have been home that week as well and never had the chance to experience being a Mom or to continue my life with Ted and all our friends and extended family. I need to be more thankful despite the sadness but it's all easier said than done. I've learned we are all stronger than we think but it doesnt mean it's easy. I was watching my neighbors house as I was watering the lawn.....both sets of grandparents were over playing with the kids. To them  this is normal. To me that is something I miss out on every day of my life. Sharing my life and family with my parents. It's a huge void that is always with me yet I am proud I continue to push forward and never stop living. Had a wonderful friend over this evening for a playdate (and wine of course) while our husband's attended this cool beer tasting event in the square.....it was a busy evening chasing the kids around but so much fun as well.

We continue to keep busy with the kiddos and hanging with such great people.....we'll head back to MI again next weekend to see our family and friends for a long weekend...and then it will soon be my 33rd birthday. Yikes. Where is the timing going....seems like yesterday I was out with my parents here celebrating my 28th...we had such a blast that night!

Thinking of everyone tonight in Colorado and to anyone else who has suffered from tragedy and mental illness.

All my love,
Melissa