home

After over 7 hours of driving today, we are home.....I am so excited to sleep in my own bed tonight. And I think Elle would agree. 

4th of July was spent at my parents lake and although I loved seeing all of my family members, pretty much my Mom's entire family, we are exhausted. The lake house is work. For 27 years of my life it was 100% enjoyment, now I know why....Mom and Dad did all of the work and we were just there to enjoy ourselves. When it was time to leave, we just left. Boy, has that changed. We are now second home owners and everything that comes along with it. I never wanted a second home this early on in life. I still thought I had many more years of just enjoying it. I so appreciate, now more then ever, my parents for putting on these amazing weekends for so many years. They never complained, they just loved being together with family and friends. I seriously think my Dad was "magic" as my Uncle Jimmy put it.  

I felt as if I could never sit down. There was always something to be cleaned, cooked, washed or put away. Not to mention doing it all with a 5 month year old, who still hadn't fully recovered yet.  

Ted and Matt worked outside for hours, put the motor on the boat only to take a few spins around the lake. The weather was absolutely perfect though. It was clear and sunny the entire weekend. 

My Grandpa loved having most of children and grandchildren/great grandchildren at the lake. It was so much fun showing my cousin Tracy and her husband "up-north", with living in Texas, they have heard so much about this place but had yet to experience it. 

Not only did we have perfect weather, perfect food and perfect company, Ted and I got a perfect surprise. One of our best friends-Josh came up on Saturday and made a surprise entrance. We enjoyed his company and we're very thankful to have spent 4th of July with him. He normally is at the Bay in Canada with his entire Family. We got him this year! 

Before heading back to Cincinnati, we did have to make one final stop. Wyandotte, MI. My Aunt and Uncle threw Grandpa O a 90th birthday party. He was on the porch, in a wheelchair, very peacefully smiling. "Happy Birthday Grandpa, I so wish your Son, my Dad was here to witness this. You have lived a wonderful life. Stay here, as long as you can. We love you. "

All my love, 

Melissa

sparkler time

I remember 4th of July very clearly last year. It was a tough one at the lake, but we made the best of it. 4th of July was their favorite time up there and in the past, my Dad's Father would travel up there, to celebrate his birthday. My Mom would always bake him a cake.

This year we are all heading up north and this time, my Mom's Sister (my Aunt) and my cousin and her husband are coming from Texas. My Mom's Dad (Grandpa G.) is hosting a dinner tomorrow and I'm really looking forward to being with my Mom's entire family. All of her siblings and my cousins. But it's difficult, she would love this. She would love the fact that everyone was "up-north", my Dad would have loved to entertain them (he was one of the best entertainers!).

Not only will we see my Mom's entire family this weekend, we'll also head back to Wyandotte to my Dad's Fathers home, as he turns 90 on Sunday. My Dad's family will all be there. All of his siblings.
We feel so blessed to be able to celebrate this day with him. At 90 years of age, life is a gift. At this point, we can truly celebrate his life. So hard to believe he will have lived over 40 years longer then my Parents did. That's tough to swallow.

Looking forward to a weekend of fireworks, s'mores, Aunt Lisa's homemade strawberry pies, my Sisters guacamole, Grandpa taking us out on his new boat, having my Mom's entire family over to our place to celebrate 4th of July. And Elle's first 4th of July. I'd like her to get used to big 4th of July celebrations at the lake....with our family....

You will be missed and thought of the entire weekend........

Happy 4th of July everyone, hope you spend it with friends and family.

Much love,
Melissa

Gray hair

Now I understand what my Dad meant when he would say that us kids were responsible for his gray hair and empty wallet.

With Elle's ER visit and follow up appointments, and with our high maintenance English Bulldog, I need a separate "medical" budget in addition to 401k, savings, etc, etc. And I will eventually be getting my hair highlighted to cover the gray I am certain to have one day.

This week we have been so focused on getting Elle better so we can take her to my parents lake in Northern Michigan to be with Family, that we just realized Gracie was acting strange. Our nerves are pretty much shot at this point as we thought she was going to have another one of her "episodes" last night. She slept in the guest bedroom with Gramma but we were awoken by them as Grace was up and not sleeping. We generally will rush her to the ER Vet in past situations, but with spending so much money on her lately and with the baby, we tried to hold out until the morning so she could see her regular Vet. She made it through and was taken in this morning. Her tail, because it's this strange corkscrew tail, is infected again and needed to be put on antibiotics and steroids and eventually it will most likely be amputated. I am telling you, if you know anyone wanting to get an English Bulldog tell them no. I say that because not many people are willing to spend the time and money these Dogs truly need to maintain their health and well being. I feel sad for those Dogs, we love this breed. We even talked our best pals into getting one and they too have spent a great deal of money on their Bully. We love Grace and we'd honestly spend any amount of money on her to keep her alive and well but with having a daughter now, it's frustrating to keep dropping the dollars on these consistent incidents.... Oh well, apparently that's why Ted and I both work...........

While children and dogs are life's most precious gifts and I feel very blessed to have both of them, I agree with my Dad, they give you gray hair and leave you with an empty wallet. But all of it's worth it. If I die a broke and gray haired woman, I will feel good that we had a fun, fulfilled life and did everything we could to keep our family happy and healthy. It's hard for me to write a "fulfilled" life at this point... as I feel right now it would be very difficult for me to be completely fulfilled with living with this tremendous void and having my brother in a facility. This will forever be a part of my life and I continue to work at it each and every day on how to still "live" with the pain but continue to have joy in all other aspects of my life. Of course I deserve it. My family and friends deserve it. Even my Dog deserves it. They need me to have joy. And I know my parents would want that for me. But it's hard, I just want them here and there's nothing I can do to change that.

I do have to laugh as I look at the picture that sits on my desk of my Dad and I. He had a beautiful full head of "gray" hair. And I distinctly remember when my Mom would tease him about having all that gray, he would say, "it's not gray, it's blonde.....now leave me alone".

Memories from our vacation

I wish you were here to see all of our pictures.........these are some of our memories. 

Thinking of you always, 

Melissa

Happy Birthday Dad

We miss you more then you or anyone will ever understand. We miss your laughter so much and your laid back personality. But most of all, we just miss our Dad. Happy 53rd Birthday.....you're remembered every day for so many things. I still cannot believe your gone. 

After a beautiful 7 day vacation in the Keys, and a scare to the ER with Elle (more on that later), Christina and I visited the cemetery today. As if yesterday wasn't emotional enough. 

Yesterday was just one of those days that I really needed my Mom. Scared, as a new Mom, I wanted "that" person to call and cry to. I continue to be shocked that I really don't have the both of you here for all of this, whether it would have been calling you from the Keys to say Hi and to say  how stunning the views were or if it would have been me calling to cry because Elle was getting her first IV at the delicate age of 5 months. At 29 years old, I continue to still need my Mom and Dad. 

Long story short.........7 wonderful days spent with wonderful people in the Florida Keys. We had a gorgeous beach house steps away from the Ocean. It was the perfect relaxing trip and Elle was so awesome. She took naps, slept in her crib and went down every night right at 9pm, enjoyed smiling and hanging out with her new pal Abby and adjusted so well from being away from home. The day we went to fly back home, something went wrong. Her day started out not right...a lot of crying and she felt warm which later turned into a 102 degree fever. 

Elle, to this day, has never really been a "crier" so we knew by her actions, something wasn't right. We made it out of the keys into Charlotte and her condition got worse. But it was when her crying stopped and she got lethargic is how I would explain it, prompted me to get off the plane that was about to take off and call the paramedics. So perhaps I overreacted, I could not take any chances. I was so scared and instantly afraid of the worse possible scenario. 

We ended up being transferred to the hospital via ambulance. As I starred at my daughter, who was actually napping, in her car seat (attached to the stretcher), I couldn't help but imagine my Mother lying there. She was alive and I suspect in very bad shape. I was looking around at all of the supplies and just thinking of the worst possible things. That day has changed my way of thinking for the rest of my life. Ambulances scare me now and I certainly did not want to be driving in with Elle this early on in life. 

Many hours later, and after an IV, Catheter, and blood work.....the doctors determined Elle had an ear infection. A pretty severe one. We made it back home this morning and she has been in pretty bad pain. I pray the antibiotics kick in soon to ease her pain and bring my Elle back. I have to say, a sick child is a very scary thing and it really just breaks your  heart as they are so helpless and rely on you so heavily to make them better. 

We are so grateful Ted's Mom followed us back to Cincinnati today and will watch Elle for a few days so we can keep her out of daycare. 

I am so relived Elle has an ear infection and hopefully her pediatrician will confirm the same thing and that in a few days, she should make a turn around. 

Life still continues to throw curve balls, but one thing is for sure......we enjoyed that vacation. 

Happy Birthday Dad, I miss you every day......

the view

We're still here in the Keys...... Here is a picture of the view from our Villa.

We're having a great time!

Down in the Keys....

Down in the Floria Keys having a wonderful time.............the house is beautiful that we rented and is right on the Ocean. The views are amazing and it has been so wonderful to be with our good friends.........we have had great meals, margaritas by the pool, kayaking, and getting some great Sun. Elle has done so well here and has slept through the night in a strange crib and has taken great naps which allow us to sit in the Sun for a few.....

We're loving every minute of this vacation and I'm enjoying the relaxation and time with friends and family. Ted's brother and girlfriend have joined us for a few days so it has been great to spend time with them.

I'll write more and post pictures upon my return........

Until then.....it's 5 o'clock somewhere.........heading to a local fish restaurant tonight for Fish Tacos!